i am finally here, after one year of seperation, nine months of no contact, 3 months of phonecalls and 100 dumb comments on his previous entry i am here again. i am back home, and when i say this, i totally mean this. everything is so normal and familiar, but precious and absolutly beautiful. i sometimes sit there, thinking about what god did in the last year and the only thing i can say is that i feel i am not worth it. not worth to receive such a love, such a beauty, such a chance to be in the holy land, to be in this congregation, becoming part of a ministry... but god is looking at me with his eyes reflecting amazing love and grace and saying: i love you and i think you are worth it.

lydia